


The Healing Halls

by Bam4Me



Series: Daycare Center [4]
Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: 13 year old Obi, Anxiety Disorder, Asexual Obi-Wan Kenobi, Caregiver!Qui, Gen, Good Xanatos, Healer Xanatos, Hormone Blockers, Like MASSIVELY sex repulsed, Little!Obi, Littles Are Known, Medical Procedures, Non-Sexual Age Play, Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Mess, Obi-Wan Needs a Hug, Padawan Obi-Wan, Poor Obi-Wan, Sex Repulsed Obi, Sleep Deprivation, Young Obi-Wan Kenobi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-27
Updated: 2018-04-27
Packaged: 2019-04-28 15:42:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14452437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bam4Me/pseuds/Bam4Me
Summary: Xanatos gets a visit from his master and padawan brother on this fine morning. How nice.





	The Healing Halls

**Author's Note:**

> This is possibly jumbled I'm sorry, but it exists and I wrote it. 
> 
> gatersgonewild.tumblr.com

Xanatos was a smart man. He’d passed his healer trials at the age of nearly nineteen standard, even though he could have taken knight trails like his elder padawan brother before him. But, that wasn’t the path for him. He wanted to save people, but no matter how many times him and his master had to use aggressive negotiations, he knew that he just didn’t want to fight for the rest of his time in the order.

 

And he’d planned to be in the order for a long time, because retiring to Telos sounded like a nightmare to end all nightmares. It had taken him more than a few counseling sessions when he was younger to realize that his father’s criticism was neither wanted, nor valid, since he was both a terrible parent, and a tyrannical dictator on their homeworld. 

 

The best thing the man had done was giving up his child to people who would be better than he was.

 

But no matter what, he wasn’t an idiot. He was a slow learner in some things, like the situation with his father that could have turned out of hand if Master hadn’t realized how terribly manipulative he was, but he learned. And he knew what it looked like when someone was worked to the bone and beyond sleep deprived.

 

His own padawan brother was a regular patient of his now days. 

 

He watched Bruck with a little smile as his padawan left the halls of healing to go to the training salls with some of the other kids in his year. He may not be a knight himself, but he could raise one, and Bruck seemed determined that’s where he was going to make his mark on this order. He was going to be a  _ great _ knight.

 

Admittedly, he tended to get a little vicious when he was angry, but Xanatos remembers what it was like, being young and angry at everything, knowing that if you were kicked from the order you’d be sent back to a world that hated everyone, rich and poor. Even after being chosen, many padawans had a fear of being told they weren’t good enough, that they would be sent away anyways.

 

Qui-Gon had suggested shared meditation with his padawan, to assure him of his feelings of being wanted and loved.

 

Of course, Master Yoda had steadily ignored Qui-Gon when he told him that, but Xanatos noted his approval, even if he couldn’t say it himself, too ingrained in the old ways of the Jedi, that attachments weren’t to be encouraged. Well, he was one to talk, because no one was more dedicated to their lineage than Master Yoda.

 

Bruck was feeling a lot better than usual this morning after their most recent shared meditation together. He’d been following his master around while he did his rounds today, quiet, and a little clingy, like Obi-Wan got when he was feeling younger. Of course, Bruck was no little, but he did get quiet sometimes. 

 

But when Qui-Gon came in with his padawan brother a moment later while Xanatos was going over patient files, he knew something was wrong. Very wrong.

 

“Well, you two look like you’ve had a few interesting nights.”

 

Obi-Wan, sweet little Obi-Wan who was on probation for the next six months. Secretly, the pediatricians and crèche staff were all overjoyed at his probation. There was nothing wrong with teens his age going on missions, but this kid was getting crap after crap on every mission they went on for the past four years since he was cleared for off world missions, and he had the self preservation -and self  _ care _ \- skills of a porg.

 

More often than not, the kid came home from any sort of mission, at least five pounds underweight and looking like he hadn’t slept since they left the temple. Qui-Gon was always insistent that Obi-Wan behaved perfectly on all missions, but even he couldn’t deny they had to keep getting his weight back up when they could.

 

Like Xanatos said, the healers and crèche masters were thinking very positive thoughts about his probation. Xanatos had a whole line of drink mixes he was planning to bully Qui-Gon into putting in Obi-Wan’s tea so he might possibly gain weight. He wanted to put so much fat on his brother, he was starting to feel like one of those ladies they always found in villages determined to feed the whole town at every single meal. 

 

If it helped, he wouldn’t complain.

 

Obi-Wan looked up at him with red rimmed eyes, face a little blotchy while he mostly hid in Qui-Gon’s neck. He looked like he hadn’t slept in a week, and Qui-Gon wasn’t fairing much better, holding the young teen against his hip while he swayed in place. They both looked utterly dreadful.

 

Obi-Wan glared when a noise caught his attention, and Xanatos winced. This was  _ not _ a happy boy right now.

 

Oh great, just soothed one beast and another is born. Today is fun.

 

He came over with a little frown, catching the little’s eye. Obi-Wan looked like he’d been caught in a whole new cycle of visions. But… if he was having visions, Qui-Gon would have come to him earlier. At this point, it was regular practice for them to give the child a mild sedative during his vision cycles.

 

It wasn’t the best idea, but Obi-Wan already had chronic insomnia and was undersized for his age. If they didn’t get him proper sleep at night, he would suffer from a lack of growth hormone, which some people don’t know, but a lack of growth hormone doesn’t just affect how tall you get in life, if he starts dropping there, he’ll get severe muscular atrophy and chronic pain.

 

The visions were still there, but at least, with the sedatives, he could sleep the night through and his body went through less trauma as a result. The mind healers helped with the rest.

 

But this couldn’t be from visions, because Qui-Gon always informed him as soon as a new cycle started. He frowned, voice low, gentle, like he was dealing with one of the patients more likely to cry than not. But Obi-Wan, precious sweet boy who still hated any and all healers visits, didn’t look upset at where he was. Upset at the world in general, sure, but not upset at being here. “Why don’t we go back to my office, huh? I’ve got a nice new rooibos tea for us to try, I picked it out especially for you, Obi-Wan.”

 

Bribery was something he wasn’t above for the little ones that were especially upset about being there, but rooibos was a caffeine free tea that was good for you, so as far as bribery went, it was one of the nicer options. Obi-Wan almost perked up a little in Qui-Gon’s arms, but even then, he looked too tired to really sit up much from his perch. Qui-Gon was giving him an utterly thankful stare, just glad Xanatos wasn’t poking fun at his younger brother for once.

 

Obi-Wan gave a tired little nod and Qui-Gon followed Xanatos back to his office. The man looked truly relieved to sit down for the moment, even if Obi-Wan refused to leave his lap.

 

Xanatos was considering just drugging them both and tossing them in an empty room to sleep for the next half a day, but it was only polite to figure out what was bothering them both so much first.

 

“You two get comfortable, I’ll be back with tea in a moment.” He grabbed the tin of the new red blend out of his desk before leaving.

 

The break room for the healers was well stocked, so he headed in that direction, finding one of the older healers sitting there on her own tea break. He sent her a thankful look when he saw the tea kettle was already back on the stove.

 

“I had the feeling you’d be in this direction. Poor Padawan Kenobi, he looked like he hasn’t slept in a month.”

 

Xanatos pulled down a sterilized sippy cup, and two much more refined tea cups, setting them on a tray while he worked. “To be honest, it’s not that he looks like he hasn’t  _ slept _ in a month, he looks like he’s been under constant  _ stress _ for a month. I just need to figure out why. I’m sure Master has assured him he’s not going to get kicked out of the Order, so it can’t be that.”

 

She nodded, a little hum in the back of her throat. “Hormones? He’s about at that age, and Kenobi is noted in his files as  _ especially _ sensitive to any sort of change. If his body is changing, he might be having any number of issues because of it.”

 

Xanatos paused, looking at her funny for a few moments, before face palming. “Oh god, you’re right, and if you aren’t, you eventually will be.” He sighed, opening up another cupboard. He rooted around for a moment before frowning. “Did the droids rearrange the cabinets again?”

 

The healer shook her head, pointing to another cabinet on the other side of the room. “No. I did that. I swear you ordered ten new meal replacement powders, they didn’t all fit.”

 

Xanatos went over to that side of the room with a delighted look, utterly gleeful that his new shipment was in. “They all had very good reviews and passed inspection. Listen, none of you will be rolling your eyes at me when I finally get this kid above a healthy weight for his age-”

 

“Fat chance, but whatever lets you sleep at night. Kenobi is never gonna be more than a little twig at this rate. Even when we do get his weight up he just drops it again.”

 

“No, it’s not what makes  _ me _ sleep at night, it’s what makes him sleep. Also, have you ever considered, that if he’s not gaining weight under your suggestions, it’s a bad method?”

 

She looked considering, but not sold. It’s fine, he doesn’t need to convince her, he just needs to find something that works. He pulled out two containers. They were the same brand, high fat and protein powder meal replacements, specially designed to help young teens going through growth spurts get the nutrition they needed to be healthy. In both vanilla and original flavor.

 

While the tea steeped he measured out a teaspoon of the powder into the sippy cup. He wanted to see if Obi-Wan would be willing to stomach it before he sent it back with the two of them. If he decided he didn’t want it, Qui-Gon would have to get creative.

 

He mixed up Obi-Wan’s sippy cup before pouring the other cups, and headed back for the door again. He just hoped that he could get Obi-Wan to talk at all. So far, the little was rather resistant to most talks about change in his life when he wasn’t feeling well. Change, much like needles, gave him anxiety, and when he was already stressed, the chances of him being willing to talk about what  _ new _ thing made him upset, went down.

 

“Call me if you need, Du Crion.”

 

He smiled at the woman before heading out. “Of course Mataii.”

 

When he got back to his office, Qui-Gon had somehow convinced Obi-Wan out of his lap and into a second seat, and the little didn’t even look upset about it, staring forward with an almost unblinking stare that gave away just how exhausted he was. Xanatos passed him the sippy cup of mixed tea, before giving Qui-Gon his own.

 

Obi-Wan tilted the cup back, taking a drink with an almost delighted hum in the back of his throat, and Xanatos labeled the new meal replacement powder a success. Good. 

 

Qui-Gon just gave a little sigh and a nod when Xanatos pointedly pushed the two canisters towards him, knowing Obi-Wan could really use them.

 

“So, what brings you two in today?”

 

Qui-Gon took a sip of the red tea, before turning to look at Obi-Wan, who pulled the sippy cup away from himself with a gasp for air. It was hard to breathe while drinking. “Broke.” And then he stuck the nib of the cup right back in. He obviously liked the new tea and powder mix.

 

Xanatos turned to look at Qui-Gon, who was tiredly blinking before he shook his head with a sigh. “Well, as you can probably guess, Obi-Wan is around that age, where his body is starting to mature-”

 

“So this  _ is _ a hormone thing?”

 

Qui-Gon nodded. He leaned forward with an odd look and it took Xanatos a half a second to reach out for him to touch. Most master and padawan bonds broke when the student was knighted, or otherwise taken in their field of training, but Qui-Gon had always had rather strong connections to his students, and his bonds with Feemor and Xanatos remained stable, as long as physical contact was initiated. 

 

_ He’s a little bit… traumatized by some of the changes in his body. _

 

_ Specifically, what changes?  _ Though, he had the feeling he already knew. 

 

Qui-Gon gave his student a bland look.  _ Frankly, he hasn’t slept right in a month because of erections. His first one sent him into a panic, and most of the rest of them seem to be traumatizing enough to make his already  _ rough _ sleep, even worse.  _

 

Xanatos winced. It wasn’t because Obi-Wan was a little, in fact, many littles were open and accepting to their sexuality, but this seemed like an Obi-Wan specific issue. Even if Obi-Wan did become interested in sex one day, chances of it happening anytime soon were slim to none. Chances of it happening at all were still open, but Xanatos had low expectations.

 

This was, to be honestly put, way too much stress to heap on a child. Obi-Wan’s standing in the order, though assured, was rocky, and his changing body along with the occasional vision between cycles, and it often made him sick with insomnia, and malnourished from not eating right.

 

It looked like he was far beyond his stress breaking point. He was halfway falling asleep in the chair, but stubbornly staying awake. Even the fact that Obi-Wan was falling asleep at all said he was too far gone to stop himself with his usually perfect self control.

 

Sith hells, even the fact that Qui-Gon wasn’t immediately and worriedly trying to coax him into his lap and to sleep, said that this had gone on for far too long. 

 

“We can use puberty inhibitors, but that comes with some side effects, such as slowing growth, his voice won’t drop, he won’t develop body hair.”

 

Qui-Gon nodded, looking at the little boy who seemed to be curiously thinking it over. “Any other options?”

 

“Well, I’ve never heard of using it on a child, but there are sex organ hormone blockers too. Honestly, I would never think to use it on a child, it’s usually used on older patients, people who have already gone through puberty, people with sex addiction, or versely, sex repulsion, people with sexual related trauma… which perfectly fits Obi-Wan’s description, now that I think about it.”

 

From Qui-Gon’s short explanation, it seemed Obi-Wan was honestly traumatized by the idea. 

 

Qui-Gon looked between Obi-Wan and Xanatos before sighing. “The puberty blockers are better. They just, stall things, right?”

 

Xanatos nodded, not taking his eyes off the teen, who was watching him curiously, looking older than he had since they got in there. Good. He should be big for this conversation.

 

“Obi-Wan, do you want puberty blockers?”

 

Obi-Wan looked down at his lap, biting his lip, definitely bigger now. “Will it make the erections stop? I can’t… I know other kids just touch them to make them stop, but…”

 

“Obi-Wan, you don’t have to touch yourself if you don’t want that. There is nothing wrong with not wanting it. Everybody is different, and often times, our minds and our bodies don’t get along. It’s the exact reason that mental illnesses happen. If your mind doesn’t produce enough serotonin, you need pills to help your body produce it. Remember, the mind healers talked with me and we got you pills to make your serotonin go up to make your anxiety stop?”

 

Obi-Wan nodded slowly. He liked those pills. He’s forgotten to take them a few times, or he couldn’t while he was on mission and they weren’t available, and he always got all panicked and nervous. Sometimes he had to hide in Master’s robes because when he got scared, he was too nervous about people looking at him. “But this time, my body is working right, but my mind doesn’t like it? Is there a pill I can take that will make me like it?”

 

Xanatos felt his heart break a little. “Obi-Wan, that’s like asking if there’s a pill that can make someone want a boyfriend instead of a girlfriend. Entire wars have been fought because people didn’t like seeing someone with their own gender. In the end, sexuality, or in this case, lack of sexuality, at least for the moment, if not forever, is not the same as anxiety. You can’t change it with a pill. You can use puberty blockers to delay how long until you have to deal with it though, or you could stop taking puberty blockers in a few years and switch straight to suppression hormones to keep not dealing with it. It’s whatever you can handle, kiddo.”

 

Obi-Wan seemed to think that over for a minute, still holding onto the sippy cup in his hands, but looking much less interested in it than before. “It’s like pressing pause on a game. I can come back to it later.”

 

Xanatos smiled. “Yes. You don’t have to think about this now. You can come back later. Right now you don’t need to worry about this, you have enough on your mind as it is.”

 

Obi-Wan nodded. “I… can we do that now? Can, I… I want it done as soon as we can do it.”

 

Xanatos nodded, standing up from the desk. “Come on, I’ll let you two settle down in a room while I work through files. I’ll need a second healer to sign off on it, but that will be fast.”

 

He lead them to a room down the hall, opening the door for them to settle in before he went back to the break room. Mataii was still there, going over files at the table. She looked up with a raised eyebrow when she saw him. “Back already? What can I help with?”

 

Xanatos sat across from her, pulling up the files on his data pad. “I need you to sign off on a procedure, so I can get Obi-Wan on hormone blockers. It’s just a formality, but since he’s underage and it involves cutting him open, it needs at least two signatures.”

 

When he finally got back to the room with papers for Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon -as his master, he technically had custody of Obi-Wan, or he wouldn’t be allowed to leave the planet with him- and found the two of them curled up in the hospital bed. It was one of those big ones, for partners to sleep in. Unsurprisingly enough, as a temple full of telepathic beings, often times partners refused to be separated while in the healing halls.

 

Qui-Gon was laying on his side, running a hand through Obi-Wan’s messy hair while the boy drank the rest of his tea next to him. He looked utterly content right then.

 

“Alright, I just need your signatures and I can start the procedure.”

 

Obi-Wan grumbled more about having to sit up than he did about signing papers, but in short order he was sitting with his back against Qui-Gon’s chest, watching Xanatos apply a topical anesthetic to the skin under his left bicep.

 

Xanatos sounded clinical as he explained about how he was going to put the little blocker under the skin before force healing the wound, and how Obi-Wan would need it changed once a year. It took ten minutes to fully numb the upper arm.

 

Obi-Wan poked at it curiously, frowning when he couldn’t feel it. He didn’t like that.

 

He hid in Qui-Gon’s chest the whole way through the procedure though, still too scared to really look at Xanatos when he was giving shots or cutting. He avoided the healing halls for a reason.

 

“There, all done. Obi-Wan, you did so good, I’m very proud of you.”

 

Obi-Wan pulled his head out of Qui-Gon’s chest, still a little weepy, but not crying thankfully. “Did good?”

 

Xanatos nodded, and Qui-Gon leaned in to press a kiss to his head. “You did so good. It’s all done now. It’ll probably take a couple of days to fully take effect, but it’s all done. No more worrying. We pressed pause and we can talk about adult stuff later.”

 

Obi-Wan gave him an utterly exhausted smile, looking so relieved he probably didn’t know how to express it. “Thank you, Xani.”

 

“Alright, I guess it’s back to our apartment-”

 

“Nope.”

 

Qui-Gon looked up at Xanatos with a frown. “It’s not?”

 

Xanatos shook his head. “Under the covers. Both of you. You’re staying here for the day. If either of you gets out of this bed I’m sedating you. You look like you got mauled by a sith.”

 

Qui-Gon looked like he was going to argue for a whole second, before he saw Obi-Wan tiredly pulling off his little boots and pushing off his outer robe. He wasn’t going to make it back to the apartment anyways. He followed suit, glaring his former padawan right in the eyes. He would get his revenge for this.

 

Right after he gets some sleep.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> gatersgonewild.tumblr.com
> 
> Yeah, it's not all that blunt about it, but Obi-Wan has eating issues. Not so much a disorder tho, he has a healthy appetite at times, like most kids, but like me, he forgets food exists. Also, raising your serotonin levels makes people naturally less hungry. Legit no joke. How to raise your serotonin? L-Tryptophan is what I use. Obi has anxiety, I have anxiety, this pill works magic. Of course, my body is a garbage can fire as well, so like... I had to heap some of that on Obi since my health has been shit lately, but like... deal with it. Okay bye.


End file.
